31 December 2000

Proof of Life

I have never cared for Meg Ryan, so there was no rush to see this. Yet the promised snow did not arrive, I had finished re-arranging the spare rooms, and I had a free pass. Ryan has never broken through as a character for me. So it is unfortunate that but for that one slip-up in the casting department, I would have thought this was a good movie. It’s like James Bond or Jack Ryan without the world domination or the national security concerns. Terry (Russell Crowe) is the hero, standing up to do what is right and must be done. (A little like in High Noon. Yet I wonder how many would be prepared to volunteer for over 6 months as he does—did he not slip out to visit his estranged son even once?) The small-unit tactics and weapons are consistently exciting, the locales sufficiently interesting, and the music by Danny Elfman helpful. The theme of this movie is cross-cutting! By the way, the final scene has lots of antennas.

135 minutes.

23 December 2000

What Women Want

Oh, like I would get excited over a movie set in Chicago. Or a movie in which the lead actor (Mel Gibson) was already fighting men made mad by the smell of gasoline at a time when the love interest (Helen Hunt) was not yet cast in a teen comedy. Or a movie in which there are two Academy Award-winning actresses (the other is Marisa Tomei) and the one in the lead is the one with the blonde hair. Or a movie which assumes that the crooning of the Rat Pack will speak to me. There are a few jabs of humor at how women don’t say what they think, but our protagonist is too ready to lie, cheat, and steal based on his magical ability to hear women’s thoughts for me to develop any sympathy.

126 minutes.

The Emperor’s New Groove

Disney seems to lose its footing whenever it tries an original screenplay. I appreciate the self-absorbed persona David Spade puts on, and this film takes much advantage from that. So when the insensitive, power-mad emperor (Spade) having been transformed into a llama by his (it’s redundant to say this) evil counsellor (Eartha Kitt) and the peasant whose house the emperor wished to demolish for a spa seek to enter a diner in disguise, where does the lipcolor come from?

78 minutes.

22 December 2000

Cast Away

Chuck Noland (Tom Hanks) lives his life by the clock as an inspector for FedEx on worldwide assignment. That clock stops when he washes up on a tropical island when the plane he is taking to Malaysia ditches and the four other crew are lost. (Yet he draws an ecliptic on the rocks to keep track of the year.) I am less impressed by the stories of Tom Hanks dieting and working out when I see that Noland’s civilian life is depicted in big sweaters and that his thighs four years after are still plenty sturdy. I also noticed that the entire sequence of the explosion and dive that brings the airplane down includes not one single cut of the exterior of the airframe. That way you aren’t left with the image of a specifically FedEx plane. Does he think about obtaining fresh water a little slowly? Nevertheless, the castaway part of the movie is plenty enthralling as one contemplates his adaptation to solitary life with none of his favorite tools at hand.

145 minutes.

21 December 2000

Dude, Where’s My Car?

I know, What Women Want was Number One at the box office last weekend. But I had misjudged how long it would take to get from the Van Dorn Street interchange to the southbound ramp at Springfield (36 minutes), so I arrived at the mall later than expected. But the Mel Gibson-Helen Hunt comedy is supposed to be long, and I had just read Dave Nuttycombe’s thumbs-up (this year’s Galaxy Quest!) in City Paper. Anyway it started 10 minutes earlier. Two roommates (Ashton Kutcher from That 70’s Show and Seann William Scott from Road Trip) are so wasted they cannot remember what they did the previous day. This is important to them because their girlfriends have reminded them by telephone that today is their 1-year anniversary, and the two slackers are positive they got great gifts for the girls (who are no less pretty than the jock’s girlfriend, here played by Kristy Swanson fully 8 years after her performance in the movie Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and left them in the car. Except, dude... where’s my car? The idea that even one of these two is old enough to own (and drive) a car is just the start of the silliness. For those who stick it out, there are a couple of surprise cameos. And it’s not that long! There is a science fiction flavor to the proceedings which may amuse some. Also on the positive side, our protagonists make use of what they have learned from educational cable programming like Animal Planet and The Discovery Channel.

83 minutes.

16 December 2000

Miss Congeniality

Sandra Bullock (producer) offers a minor comedic confection for the holidays. The production in Austin and San Antonio allowed her to stay close to home. To say that there was location shooting in New York City is a bit of a stretch when the only recognizable footage is clearly from across the Hudson. Bullock stars as a rough-and-tumble FBI agent who finds herself working undercover as a contestant in a beauty pageant. Was the casting agent instructed to be certain to hire only very tall men? There was not much to be done about how she towers over the other contestants. The film manages a far more exquisitely funny plea for inclusiveness and empowerment that anything Sally Field managed in Beautiful. (Interestingly, it is the l-word that makes its contribution.) That sense of second-hand I got might be because the song Mustang Sally on the soundtrack is the one performed by the Commitments, yes, the group from that 1991 film of the same name depicting Irish people imitating African-American soul. Update: I found this movie very funny without the mean streak of Drop Dead Gorgeous or Beautiful. No one dies that I remember. There is a satisfying collection of well-known talent: William Shatner, Candice Bergen, Ernie Hudson, Michael Caine. They do push the world peace joke a little, but it’s worthwhile—there is a great line for the FBI agent part of the character. There is a little suspense (a bomber is threatening the pageant) and a little romance (Benjamin Bratt from The Next Best Thing) to go with the jokes.

110 minutes.

A Hard Day’s Night (1964)

This was necessary for my cinematic education. Presumably no one will be re-releasing Spice World after 35 years for its historical-cultural significance. Yet the predecessor was no less hastily assembled and the plot line (the four young men and a grandfather who’s quite the mixer ride the train into London to do a televised concert) is no less contrived. The assortment of infatuated and exasperated characters find their inspiration here (and in the actual documentary by the Maysles which I have not seen). The director of the concert is particularly fearful of being reassigned to News in Welsh if things don’t work out. Clearly, swipes at various aspects of culture in the United Kingdom are perennial.

89 minutes.

09 December 2000

Unbreakable

That’s it?! I paid all of nothing to see this?! (I had finally managed to reach the free movie reward point total the previous evening.) Having seen the previous production from M. Night Shyamalan (The Sixth Sense) for free (twice), I was wary. The wariness was justified. Despite the meticulous work by Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, and Robin Wright Penn, the ending makes you go bleaah. The plot has absolutely nothing to do with immortality, either.

106 minutes.

08 December 2000

The Family Man

The only thing I have in common with the character Nicolas Cage plays is the Herman Miller Aeron chair. He starts his morning singing opera, drives a Ferrari (the 456 GT), and arranges multi-billion dollar mergers. But an unexpected telephone call, and a close call with an armed robber, leads to a bizarre experience. Naturally, I attended this special sneak preview for Téa Leoni, and I was pleasantly surprised that she managed to make the mother in all those layers more adorable than the black turtlenecked professional. The specificity of 13 years hits a little close to home. The screenplay loses its way among the different threads, but a few scenes, like the daughter’s reaction and explanation, are sufficiently up-to-date. There’s never a library computer around when you need one to tell you who you are.

Update:

One other thing the rich character and I have in common—unmarried.

127 minutes.